It’s taken me a long time (well, Will is five months old, so I guess it’s taken me five months) to really come to terms with the fact that I had a C-section. First, you should know that I did not have a 12 page birth plan nor was I super gung-ho about having a natural birth. I wanted one, but I do know that birth is one of those things you just don’t have 100% control over, and so for nine months I psyched my control-freak self up and tried to relax and trust my doctor. Side note, my doctor was kind of shocked that I didn’t have a typed up birth plan to give her. I guess she picked up on my control-freakiness over the course of nine months.

Disclaimer: I’m not going to get super into the details medically because ew, and some things really should be private. Reliving the details of the scariest day of my life is not awesome for me, but I do want to put this out there in case others moms might have had a similar experience and are looking for some camaraderie – it’s just nice to know you’re not alone in this sometimes.

Please take a moment and admire this photo my sister took of me in the parking lot at Tucker’s Onion Burger a few days before I went into labor. Don’t I just have that “pregnancy glow” haha

So, I saw my doctor the day before I went into labor at 39 weeks 5 days. I was 4.5 cm dilated and 75% effaced, so things were definitely progressing. During that appointment she said to me, “I hope you go into labor tonight because I’m on call.” Never did she say that she might be unavailable over the next few days. Funnily enough, I did go into labor that night. I came home from church and rolled around on a yoga ball and watched The Fault in Our Stars with Sam because he would basically do anything I asked at that point. I went to bed that night and the contractions were mild but getting stronger and closer together. I woke up the next morning and did not feel well at all. I went back to sleep and woke up around 11am and something was just not right. I felt feverish and extremely weak. I told Sam we had to go to the hospital immediately.

We got to the hospital and a random doctor came in and said that my doctor was “unavailable” that day and he would be delivering me. You can imagine how I took this news. I’ll just leave it at – I was not pleasant. Part of the reason I did not write up any plans was because I fully trusted this woman and her expertise. The new doctor ended up being fantastic – really I can’t say enough good things about him – but that completely threw me for a loop since I had just seen my doctor THE DAY BEFORE and she hadn’t mentioned anything. In my opinion, this kind of set the tone for the whole experience…..

This post is already getting super long so I’m going to split it into two parts. Stay tuned for Part II in which William Craig makes his debut, and the Craigs spend the worst five days of their life in the hospital. Should be fun!